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- TOP TEN WEIRD LOOKING DOGS
- Accompanied by photos of dogs from the 119th Westminster Kennel Club
- Dog Show
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- 10. "Obsessed with Wilford Brimley"
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- 9. "Minoxydil in his Alpo"
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- 8. "Picks up free HBO"
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- 7. "Gooned on malt liquor"
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- 6. "Previously owned by Lyle Lovett"
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- 5. "Grand champion: static cling division"
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- 4. "Needs a flea collar"
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- 3. "On loan from a car wash"
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- 2. "The third Menendez brother"
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- 1. "Ed Sullivan Theater rat"
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- Playout - "Do the Dog"
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- Letterman, Tuesday, February 14, 1995
- Copyright Worldwide Pants, Inc. 1995
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